More Guilty Pleasures

1. www.newyorksocialdiary.com
2. The piano music that plays at the end of Saturday Night Live
3. Twix
4. The fact that, "Alicia Keys tried to talk some sense in 'em..."
5. The Old Spaghetti Factory
6. Surround sound
7. My upside down mouse
8. Cowboy boots
9. INXS's Kick
10. 'That's Right' by DJ Taz
11. Writing lists
12. Breakfast at Ikea
13. Fuelman cards
14. Earl Graves
15. Old Navy
16. The voice of NPR's Carl Kasell
17. Michael Meyers, the Executive Director of the New York Civil Rights Coalition
18. The reporting of NPR's Lakshmi Singh
19. Doing the right thing.
20. Swatch watches

I'm Joe, and that's how I see it.

Guilty Pleasures Pt. II

George did it...now I will too. I'm sorry Georgie...you inspired me.

1. Kristin Davis as Charlotte York
2. Memorizing Winston Zeddemore's lines from 'Ghostbuster's' and 'Ghostbuster's II'
3. The sale rack at The Gap
4. Vanity Fair
5. Very long conversations with Seth
6. Spelman yearbooks
7. Making fun of everything
8. Anything by Cash Money
9. Ingratiating myself
10. Aquafina
11. Tower Records
12. Limewire
13. The Larry Sanders Show
14. The comic stylings of Janeane Garafalo
15. Feigning ignorance
16. Fabulous by Jaheim
17. Regular M&M's
18. 'This Is How We Do' by 50 & Game
19. Missing 'Entourage'
20. Hearing Seth/Rainey/John hoop...

I'm Joe, and that's how I see it.

When the Pawn...

Jonathan and Tash got me hooked to her music in the spring of 2000. Though, if I'm being accurate, I have to admit that my sister, the arbiter of all style, did try to get me to listen to Fiona early on. But 'When the Pawn...' was too good to be true. Get over yourself and go pick this thing up. It's probably available on Amazon for a little over 55 cents. The sound is mesmerizing and the production and the execution of beats, lyric and the meaning behind the songs will throw you headlong into a trance of cathartic thought, tumbling toward the warm euphoric sense that this music is more than just music, it's a panacea for the ills that your soul endures on a daily basis.

That's right, I said all of that. And seriously, get over yourself, and get on this album. And while your at it, get on these too...

Jagged Little Pill - Alanis Morrisette



The sad thing is that despite the fact that this album is one, if not the best selling album of all-time, not enough of the Brothers have it. I still remember my first year at Morehouse, when we had video machines in the cafeteria, how a song from this album was picked over and over again, 'Head Over Feet.' But I remember more vividly how the Brothers were definitely singing along to it...word for word.

U2 - The Joshua Tree



A whimsical retreat to the days when they were just a bunch of kids from Ireland looking to rock your damn world. Now, they are extremely wealthy older men looking to change the world. Either way, I still haven't found what I'm looking for, and it's been 18 years since I first heard those piercing words leave Bono's lips, go through the channel then known as Video Hits One and come out of my television in the family room, where those words wafted to my ears.

Frank Sinatra - Only the Lonely



Just do it. Don't question me, just listen to it. You'll see what I'm saying.

Common - One Day It'll All Make Sense



Do your history, and learn more about what he was saying in the 90s.

T.I.(P.) - I'm Serious



Do your history again. T.I. was definitely on point in this debut effort.

"Goodnight!!!" - Jay-Z



I'm Joe and that's how I see it...

Bear with me

I just have to get this down...

In December 1993...

I wore shorts at H.U. The weather was balmy right before we went home. I remember my main man Jimmy and I rocked the Gap shorts on our way to the library to study for our Psych exam which I failed. I bought Madden 1994, because back then, that's when the games used to come out, in December. I bought 'Christmas Interpretations', and put my boy Gene (genoyoung.com) down with it. I was supposed to meet Michelle Marion in the cafe, but I played it too cool like I had more important things to do. I regretted the decision in January. The Cowboys went 4-0. I went home and was still the toast of the town. Boone's Farm was beginning to lose its luster...a little bit. New Year's eve with the old crew.

In December 1994...

It was cold in D.C. I was feuding with Benji. Me and D were tighter than ever. Tim was growing on me. Suite 603 was the most important thing to me. I got some Arturo Fuentes as a Christmas gift. I went to the Moorland-Spingarn Reading Room to have the showdown. D went with me for more support ('I love you for that my n****, no matter what' - Jay-Z, The Blueprint). Calvin Klein jeans. We bought Madden 95. My roommate went home early. Went on a double date with Jimmy, his girl and a girl from Houston with the mean walk, just to avoid the Suite 603 party. The blue peacoat from Structure was the key part of my look. I sported facial hair. I hated the 49ers. The Contract with America was kicking off. I saw Paula Jones on the local Fox channel talking about dealings with Clinton, I thought nothing of it. New Year's eve with Josh and Aaron.

In December 1995...

Emmitt broke the TD record in Arizona on Christmas night. 4&1 at the Vet. CI came to Dallas for Christmas. I went to Tom and Bert's Christmas Eve party and returned home well after midnight. I tore the ligaments in my left leg falling down 14 steps at home. I met David Robinson and Avery Johnson at Reunion Arena. 6 Mavs games...courtside baby.

In December 1996...

I saw Jerry Maguire. Reunited. It snowed at Morehouse. New Year's eve in downtown Dallas.

In December 1997...

Christma Carol Concerts...every damn night. Christmas gifts a plenty. Got new cowboy boots from parents. Abercrombie Christmas for the Carlos kids. Dad threatened to sign me up for the Navy if I didn't start acting right.

In December 1998...

Broke. Afraid I wouldn't get home. Wasted tons of money trying to impress people. Hung with Vin extra tight. Went to Alabama. Went home. Broke rules. Endangered trusts. Bought some longhorns for the apartment.

In December 1999...

Nutcracker Suite. Kept the fire kindled. Mistake after mistake after mistake. Received muffins from a good friend. BJ gave me clothes. D helped me out with extra dough for the flight. D and I had Antoy's car. Went out 5 times in as many days. Deuce Bigalow at Magic Johnson. New Year's Eve on White Rock Lake...like old times.

In December 2000...

Lunch at Murphy's. I had Raj's car. The Triplex was cold and lonely. Toy came to Dallas.

In December 2001...

Raj graduated. Glad to be home.

In December 2002...

Bralyn got commissioned. We met Earl Graves.

In December 2003...

Metro-Manhattan Links Christmas party. They caught Hussein. Studying for finals. I passed all of my classes. I didn't get to see Simon & Garfunkel. I cried when Joi left. I got the BMW. Lekan helped me out. At watch service at church, I told the congregation that I would indeed graduate...which I did.

In December 2004...

Spence is back. Short vacation. Work, work, work. Where was George? I missed my guys. JC came back.

I'm Joe and that's how I see it.

God Lives Through...

The best song on A Tribe Called Quest's 1993 masterpiece, 'Midnight Marauders' was the last track, 'God Lives Through.' What a title. My friends from Howard, Benji, D, Ace, Ray, Braeden, Tim, Jeff & Co., used to freestyle to it everytime we played it. Mine would usually go horribly and would some how incorporate the nickname, 'Joey C' and 'Howard University.'

"Oh my God!" -> Busta Rhymes (16X)

[Phife Dawg]
There's a million MC's that claim they want some
But see, I create sounds that make your ears go numb
Peace to Sayers Ave., yeah you know how we go
My best friend Steven at the Home Depot
Lowerton is in the house, I can't forget Southside
Walk past MC's like that girl did the Pharcyde
I'm labeled as the cat's meow, the MC with the know-how
Act like you know, not now, but right now
Beast of the East, on MC's I have a feast
I'd eat that ass like quiche, crack a smile like Shanice
Straight out Jamaica scene, Jamaica, Queens
But you could find me out in Georgia, or anywhere in between
Now if my partners don't look good, Malik won't look good
If Malik don't look good, the Quest won't look good
If the Quest don't look good, then Queens won't look good
But since the sounds are universal, New York won't look good
Picture Phife losin a battle, come on, get off it
Put down the microphone son, surrender forfeit
Did I hear somethin bout a crew? What they wanna do?
You better call Mr. Babyface, so he can bring out _The Cool in You_
or it'll be a sad love song being sung by Toni Braxton
And I'll dissect you like a fraction
Oh, you wannabe top cat MC's, I'll pop you like a zit
You wanna be the champ, you more like Chief Some-shit
Big up myself everytime when it comes to this
MC's be runnin scared as if they're watchin the Exorcist
I kick more game than a crackhead from Hempstead
My styles are milk, man, you'd think that I was breast fed
You know the steelo when the diggy Dawg is on the scene
I dedicate this to all the MC's outta Queens
that goes for Onyx, LL, Run-D.M.C.
Akinyele, Nasty Nas and the Extra P
You need a chart, straight up and down man, there ain't no other
Nuff respect to all my peeps that made the album cover
Yo, Tip don't worry Dunn you know I get the party jumpin
Get on the mic and break em off a lil lil sumthin
Yo, Tip don't worry Dunn you know I get the party jumpin
Get on the mic and break em off a lil lil sumthin (Ooohh...)

"Oh my God!" -> Busta Rhymes (16X)

[Q-Tip] (over Busta Rhymes)
La, la, la, la..
Doop, doo, do, do..
La, la, la, la..
Shooby-doop, do, do..
La, la, la, la..
Shooby-doo, do, do..
You know I'm on the other, for the top 40
Haha, you gotta do it like this..

We got the funk doody don shit, clearly it's the bomb shit
So recognize me, kids memorize me
Everyday, I be scroungin, really, I be loungin
I play the down low, very very incognito
Aries is my sign, I know that I can rhyme
Sometimes I rhyme in riddles, plus I make the hunnies wiggle
Intellect is the major, some heads like to wager
The skills on the hill, overlookin dollar bills
Man, ya crazy, thinkin you can phase me
The Ab doesn't study near nonsense money
Life seems to meet me, MC's seem too cheesy
With they doody ass renditions of defeatin competition
I rock to the roll man, yes, I'm a soul man
Bet'cha bottom dolla, Vinia will make ya holla
As ya stand at attention, did I forget to mention
MC's will give me twenty, if I sense that they act funny
Lyrics are abundant, right there, I sound redundant
Just mentionin the fact, that the area is fat
I dwell in the unda, so hunny, it's no wonder
That I get plenty of tail, well I even get white
I'ma bet hittin head crack, there money, take that
Breakin niggaz off, cut their bank, then I'm off
While my Nik'es match my lil hat, beat joint is mad fat
Got the cutter of the box if a kid thinks he's ox
For tier means creator, the poetry relator
It's hemp, like Betsy Ross, let me tell you who's the boss

La, la, la.. ("Oh my God!" -> Busta Rhymes)
La, la, la.. ("Oh my God!" -> Busta Rhymes)
La, la, la.. ("Oh my God!" -> Busta Rhymes) smooth it y'all
La, la, la.. ("Oh my God!" -> Busta Rhymes)
La, la, la.. ("Oh my God!" -> Busta Rhymes)
La, la, la.. ("Oh my God!" -> Busta Rhymes)
La, la, la.. ("Oh my God!" -> Busta Rhymes)
La, la, la.. ("Oh my God!" -> Busta Rhymes)

Queens got a Zoo
Brooklyn got a Zoo
Bronx got a Zoo
Long Island got a Zoo
Long Island.. got the zone
Jersey got a Zoo
Philly got a Zoo
Milwaukee got a Zoo
L.A. got a Zoo
Oaktown got the zone

La, la, la.. (4X)
See, I like to get down Jack

I'm Joe, and that's how I see it...

Proust Questionnaire

What is your greatest fear?
No grad school acceptances.

Which historical figure do you most identify with?
Nick Carraway/Vertner Woodson Tandy

What is your greatest extravagance?
Bullie products

What is your favorite journey?
Walking the monuments in D.C. when the cherry blossoms are in season. The walk from Lincoln to Washington to Jefferson is so beautiful and quite underrated. If you haven't done it, you must.

What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
Pride.

On what occasion do you lie?
When playing NCAA 2006 on PlayStation 2

What do you dislike most about your appearance?
My receding hair

Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
Rap lyrics

What is your greatest regret?
The first day that I missed Dr. Kamau Johnson's Psychology class at Howard and didn't care if I missed it. Slippery slope pally. Slippery slope indeed.

What or who is the greatest love of your life?
My siblings

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
My credit report.

What do you consider your greatest achievement?
Earning a B+ on my thesis from Dr. Tobe Johnson, and him calling me "Joe." It was the greatest feeling in the world.

If you could choose what to come back as, what would it be?
My future son

If you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what do you think it would be?
The Morehouse College Seal

What is your most treasured possession?
1) 1990 State Championship ring - I lost it however.
2) Morehouse College bowling ball

What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
No hope.

Where would you like to live?
On a private street off of Cascade Rd. in Atlanta.

What is your favorite occupation?
Head Writer of a hip show

What is the quality you most like in a man?
The ability to be rational.

What is the quality you most like in a woman?
The ability to be rational.

What do you most value in your friends?
Their ears

Who are your favorite writers?
Scott Fitzgerald, Dowd, Wolfe

Who are your heroes in real life?
My parents

How would you like to die?
Peacefully and in my sleep.

What is your motto?
"Know the quality of your intentions..." - Tash Moseley

I'm Joe and that's how I see it.

Inside the Actors Studio

James Lipton: "Tonight, we have a special treat. One of the most important writers of the 21st century will be joining us to speak about his works from the written page, stage, small screen and film. He has written 6 books, for which he has earned numerous prizes including the Pulitzer, he has written 4 plays, for which he has earned a Tony Award, and he has written, directed and produced a variety of programs for television and film, garnering him Emmy Nominations, Ace Award Nominations, Golden Globe Nominations and Academy Award Nominations. Tonight, he will speak to us about his life and his inspirations. Ladies and gentleman, I am proud to introduce to the Actor's Studio...Joseph Carlos!!!"
THUNDEROUS APPLAUSE

JL: Joseph, welcome to the Inside the Actors Studio!
JC: Thanks James. May I call you James?
JL: Of course.
JC: Then thanks. My father, who is here tonight, and I used to watch this show before it became a cultural phenomenon. So, this means a great deal to me and my family.
JL: And it means a great deal to us.
JC: As well it should.
JL: 6 other graduates of Morehouse College have graced this stage as guests. Aside from Julliard and other schools whose main emphasis is the arts, Morehouse stands alone in producing the most guests on this program.
JC: (Interrupting) James, thanks for telling me something else I can brag about.
LAUGHTER
JL: Spike Lee, Samuel Jackson, Saul Williams, Jamal Dedeaux, George Peters, Kwaben Haffar and now you, Joseph Carlos...What is it that makes Morehouse special?
JC: How long is this show? Man...that's a tough one. I'd have to see that it's the cohesive nature that is naturally formed. We are an all-male, predominately African American institution, and that distinction brings us together in natural ways like you'd never know. I mean, 24 hours a day, as a student, you are seeing positive, accomplished, erudite, African American men, and you can't help but what to be a part of that positivity. I don't know what Spike and Sam said, but since George, Jamal and Kwabi are close, personal friends of mine, I can safely say that their opinion would be similar.
JL: At Morehouse, you were involved with everything.
JC: Yeah, I was. Well, I was an undergraduate student for 11 years.
JL: How did you manage that.
JC: It wasn't easy! No, I wasn't very focused on my academics obviously. I was more interested in learning the way that I wanted to. Eventually, my father and mother made it extremely evident that they could take no more of it, and put their feet down, and I buckled down and finished up my degree in Political Science.
JL: But you didn't even start at Morehouse, you started at Howard University in Washington, DC...
JC: You have good info on those blue cards. Yes, I did begin at HU. I was a film student there, but once again not serious about my studies.
JL: What were you serious about?
JC: Exploring DC and the eastern seabord. Reading books in the library. The NFL. Sega Genesis proficiency. The Howard co-eds. The normal things a freshman is concerned with.
JL: And all of these experiences helped you to write your wonderfully poignant collegiate memoir, "When I Was In College..."
APPLAUSE
JC: Yes. I was at Benihana in Atlanta, and a buddy of mine suggested that I write my collegiate story. Little beknownst to him that I had already started doing so, and the rest is history.
JL: Where did you get the title from?
JC: My friend John Cox. He figured that when I was telling stories about college, I would start off with that phrase, and it kind of stuck. My brother felt I should use a line from 'Gross Pointe Blank' in which Jeremy Piven says, "Ten years! Ten years? Ten years!" John's idea won out.
JL: Indeed it did. Was the book cathartic for you?
JC: Great question. You are so good at this. Yes, it was. No therapy in the world, and believe me, I've tried, could help me get over years of frustration like writing everything down. To me, the book is a history lesson, a cautionary tale, a commentary, a humor-filled, anecdoete laden opus-like love song to the late nineties and early 2000s.

(The music plays, and a scene from the HBO movie adaptation of the book plays)

www.any1man.com

"Please, please, please, please" - James Brown

Go to my friend's site and check out updates on his one man hit play, "Any1Man." The play may be coming to a town near you in 2006, so check out the site, drop a line, and see what's good.

I'm Joe and that's how I see it.

I haven't

I haven't espoused an opinion on much in some time, so I figured I'd do it today. I hope all is well with you, my friends and loyal readers. There's so much going on in the world today, that I guess I should express how I feel about it.

Richard Pryor



I was forbidden to watch him because of the language that he used. I was once grounded for sneaking to watch 'Jo Jo Dancer Your Life Is Calling.' I was in the sixth grade, and I was told specifically not to watch the tape that was at our north Dallas home on Harvest Glen. Of course I watched it, and true to form, I couldn't stop talking about it. My mother, infinitely more intelligent than her eldest son, asked me a few questions, surmised that I'd seen it, and promptly grounded me from television for a month. The grounding was lifted when I astutely remembered to turn off an iron in the laundry room, without being told to do so. But back to Richard...He was always kind of odd looking to me, but always funny. His body moved in a strange way when he was on stage, but his voiced remained consistent. His comedy was so real that it couldn't be measured, because no one before or since has done what he did, so there's nothing to put it up against. He is the architect of how standup is done today, and of concert films. But he was a great writer, intellectual, socially concerned individual, actor, thinker and businessman. It wasn't all about the jokes all the time. My favorite performances of his were in "Jo Jo Dancer", "Bustin' Loose", "The Toy", "The Mack", "Which Way Is Up", and "Harlem Nights." And hopefully, some brilliantly minded exec at a DVD distribution company will come up with the idea to put these and other films of his together to re-release them on DVD in his honor. In 2005, we've lost many greats, and King (of Comedy) Richard, is definitely one of them.

Stanley 'Tookie' Williams



I do not believe in the death penalty. However, I do believe that if a man has been incarcerated, shown that he acknowledges the errors of his ways and does what he can to be a better man, that he should be allowed to live out his days. Arnold Schwarzenegger and the State of California, which he controls, thought differently. There's really nothing to debate about this. Just remember that it's 2005. Why are you surprised?

Kanye West's Grammy Nominations
My prediction for 2006 is that there will begin to be a divide between Kanye West and Jay-Z. Ego, money, power and everything else that goes with all of that, can only live in harmony for so long. Congrats Kanye. I hope you win everything that you can this year. 'Late Registration' is definitely deserving. My vote is with Jigga.

The trial
This thing is a joke. How does the world have the temerity to try this man, when world leaders the world over are responsible for the deaths of people daily?

Fresh Air with Terry Gross
If you don't listen to it, you should. If you do listen to Terry everyday, you already know where I'm coming from. She is on the money and always has great interviews with relevant people about topics that are of the utmost importance. www.npr.org

Goodnight! - Jay-Z

I'm Joe and that's how I see it.

Straight from the pages of George's Blog

Dear Summer,
I know you gon' miss me...

Just kidding. George, I told you I would bite off of you, because the idea's too good to waste. So, here are my guilty pleasures...

1. Watching the DVD of my baccalaureate service from Morehouse
2. US Weekly



3. Going into Sharper Image. As of this day, December 13th, 2005 I have never, ever bought anything from there despite having gone into Sharper Image in 13 different U.S. cities over the past 18 years.
4. Google. No need to explain.
5. Bruster's Ice Cream. Double Chocolate Chunk with crushed Reece's Peanut Butter cups
6. Delilah's radio show. I got hooked on this show during the 1997-98 school year. www.delilah.com.
7. Talking industry with Tash
8. Riding by my old house from College, The 145.
9. Yo Crunch Vanilla Yogurt with Reece's Pieces
10. Everyone Loves Raymond
11. Being a Yankees fan
12. Vicarious living
13. Target
14. Midnight runs to Wal-Mart for more Yo Crunch
15. Picture sites
16. The music of Neil Diamond ("Hello, My Friend, Hello", "Sweet Caroline", "America", "Girl, You'll Be A Woman Soon")



17. 80s and 90s movies about life in New York. Despite what my brother says, this was our first outlet to life in New York. And we, being southwestern raised cosmopolitan African Americans, felt that the education that we received from the movies was 100% accurate. You have to remember that we're talking about a place and time that if you'd actually visited New York, you were seen as worldly.
18. Anything by Woody Allen
19. Christmas music...year round
20. The music of NFL Films
21. The bathroom at the Macy's Men's Shop at Atlanta's Lenox Square Mall
22. Every now and then, walking to Harkness Hall at Clark Atlanta University, and reciting Larry Fishburne's opening monologue from 'School Daze.' If you don't know what I'm talking about, stop right now. Get in your car or on mass transit, and head to the nearest Blockbuster, and rent 'School Daze.' Come home. Insert the movie into the DVD player, sit back and learn.



23. Overuse of lines from the films of Woody Allen, Spike Lee and Wes Anderson
24. "Hitch"
25. "Friends"
26. Secretly digging Kanye. It's the conflict that grips us all, but I feel that I must admit it.
27. Remembering time periods by semester.
28. The over organization of my files on my computer. Far too many folders.
29. I keep everything.
30. My memory.
31. My pride in other HBCU's.

I'm Joe, and that's how I see it.